BTS and Their Impact on My Life

Hi. I want to talk about something that I’m sure others have done before. BTS. Yeah, that K-Pop band. But more about their impact on my life. The whole love yourself series, and love myself/speak yourself project too.

So, I’ve been listening to them for a while (a year maybe? more than a year?). And, somehow, they’ve made an impact to my life. Thankfully, for the better.

The band’s purpose when it was formed was to be a shield for the youth. To speak up about things when they are wrong. To become a representative of the youth.

As someone who were born after them, as a millennial, as part of the youth, I’d say they’ve made it.

It’s painfully satisfying to feel as though some people feel the same as I do. It’s even more satisfying to hear them speak up about it.

I can’t cover all the topics but maybe I’m going to write about some of them.

To start things out, Love Yourself. They’ve released three albums of the series. First one being an EP, second a full album, and third a repackage album.

“I’m the one I should love in this world

Me, who shines, my precious soul

Now I finally realize, so I love me

Though I may lack some things, I’m so beautiful”

- Lyrics from "Epiphany."

Maybe it’s my fault for listening to songs that I’ve listened to. But all of my life, the only songs I’ve ever listened to have mostly been saying things like “I’m gonna prove them wrong. I’m gonna fight for this. That I’m worth it.”

BTS have been the first one to tell me to love myself. Maybe I should love myself first before I try loving others, whether it be friendships or romantic relationships.

I think they’ve changed me a lot. In a good way. I feel as if I’m kinder. Or at least, more considerate towards the worlds’ choices on treating me. Makes me more critical about my choices and what effects they’d have on others.

Maybe as I grew older, I’ve grown with them.

I haven’t listened to them for long, but after checking out their old records, I felt the things that they’ve been saying.

Their projects have been determined since their debut. It’s called Reflection of Youth. The first part of the chronicle is called School Trilogy, a defiant teenager – 2 Cool 4 Skool, O!RUL8,2?, Skool Luv Affair, Skool Luv Affair Special Edition, and Dark & Wild albums. The second part is Youth Trilogy, a adrift youth – The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Pt.1, The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Pt.2, and The Most Beautiful Moment in Life: Young Forever albums. The third part is Wings, temptation and conflict – Wings and You Never Walk Alone albums. And the fourth part is Love Yourself, self love – Love Yourself: Her, Love Yourself: Tear, and Love Yourself: Answer albums. (There is a fifth part of the project but it is still undisclosed).

The first part of it reminds me when I was still in school. I was angry all the time. I despised everything about myself. I was confused. Thought I had known all the things I needed to know. Turns out I was still learning. About the world and about the people I’m interacting and will be interacting with. About myself. As I grew older, I realized I still have a whole lot to learn. And I will always have something to learn about myself.

Now, out of school and into university, I think I’m in the second part of their project.

I’ve been wondering, “Has this been a good life? Have I chosen the best path that I could have taken? Have I made the wrong decisions? Are all of this the worst case scenario? Could I have done any better? Will I be a better person? Where will this lead me? Where will I end up? Am I useful enough? Am I successful enough? Will I do better?” or, in worse times, “When will all of this end? Will it end? Can I survive all this pain?” and etcetera, the list goes on.

“You’re just in uni, this all nothing! You haven’t tried living the real, bitter world!” Maybe. But maybe I deserve to feel all of this too. Maybe I’m still trying.

I’m straying from the point and I can’t see the line. I’m gonna try making it back to the point.

The second part is about enjoying life, and for it being their most beautiful moment in life. For them, they think now is their most beautiful moment in life, in this Love Yourself era. For me, I’m still trying to find out.

HYYH (화양연화/The Most Beautiful Moment in Life) has got to be the era that hurts me the most. And maybe it’s the era I’m gonna live through for the next couple of years.

This era tells the story of even through the heartbreaks and the pain of everything, we still have to come back up. Even if we have nothing, at least we can pick ourselves up. Getting up after every fall.

We’re the youth. We’re too old to be treated like a child, too young to know about the world.

No one can tell us how to do things. Every one of us live a different life. Even your parents, your siblings, or your twins live a different life than you. Even if you grew up in the same circle with someone else, you feel different things, think different things. No one can tell us anything but advices.

It’s okay to fall. It’s okay to cry. This isn’t the end. Let’s get back up and start again.

The third part of the series is Wings. Each member gets to perform a song on their own. It’s them telling their own stories.

I’m gonna skip it because it feels a little personal to me although I don’t think I have lived through Wings era yet, and, honestly, I am very scared of it.

The fourth part of the series is Love Yourself. I haven’t lived through this era either but I’ve been holding on to some of the songs.

From LY: Tear, the song that stands out the most to me is "Paradise." It’s them telling me it’s okay to not have a dream. It’s okay if you just want to survive. Don’t bother chasing for something pointlessly, to be in a marathon without a destination. Breath, it’s going to be okay. Just live and do what you do.

From LY: Answer, it’s I’m Fine and Answer: Love Myself.

With I’m Fine, they’re telling me it’s okay even if all I feel is sadness, if I feel like I’m in an endless dream, if I fall so hard I feel like I can’t get back up again, if all I see is darkness and I’m in a repeating nightmare on my own, it’s okay. It’s okay because I still have myself to depend on. That with all sadness, scars, and memories, I still have to smile and let go. I am my own salvation and that even if I start to change, at least I’m still me. That I might be different but maybe it’s just another version of me. A version out of a lot of versions I’m going to be and versions that I have been before.

With Answer: Love Myself, Suga’s verse pointed out that we set goals higher to ourselves than to others. That we put our standards stricter to ourselves.

The saying “you should treat others as you would treat yourself” is a very dangerous thing because the person I despise the most is myself, when I can forgive others way easily.

Answer: Love Myself is them admitting that maybe there isn’t an answer to loving oneself. That maybe there is no proper way of loving yourself. Maybe acknowledging the good and the bad things that I have is the first step of loving myself.

Something I’ve been telling myself for a few years now is “Allowing yourself to exist is a step closer to actually existing.” Doesn’t make sense, right? But for me, existing means accepting myself that maybe I’m worth every struggle that I got. Allowing myself to think I’m human. Human enough that I would treat myself like how I’d treat others. I’m sure I could think of more things about that one line on every other day but I can’t think of anything about that line right now.

Moving on to the mixtapes. All the mixtapes have a special place in my heart. But Mono is the one that I feel like I need it right now. For now, the one that stands out the most from that mixtape for me are seoul, moonchild, and forever rain.

Seoul talks about how even with all the downside a capital city would have, he still loves Seoul, that it is now his home, that he could never leave Seoul. For me, who were born, grew up, and still live, in a capital city, I kinda feel that too. With all the buildings, the cars, buses, and motorcycles, the pollution, the stress, the dead-eyed looking people, and all the downside that you’d expect from a city, it it still my home. A place that I know well but still a stranger to me. It changes so quickly and maybe that’s why I’m good at adapting. Strong enough to handle the stress that comes with it too.

Moonchild and forever rain are songs that feel too personal. I can’t write anything about them so I might suggest for you to watch the lyric videos.

I’m sure I’ve missed some points that I have originally intended to include in this piece but for now all of these are what I can think of.

My opinions may differ from you but art is something that should be interpreted individually. It depends on who examines it. Yours and mine are different. None of it are wrong. All of them are beautiful in its own ways.