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"Not Ready To Make Nice"

No Room For Toxins

Have you ever heard the song by Dixie Chicks called "Not Ready To Make Nice"? Do you know the story behind the song? I recently heard this song, and it was not what I expected it to be. I thought it was going to be one of those country songs about breakups or cheating. So, I had heard if it but never listened to it. One day I was listening to some songs and it popped up, and I heard some of it before being able to change it, and I thought to myself, "Hmmm... okay I am going to give this a real listen." So I played it back from the beginning, and it really hit home with me.

In March of 2003, while performing in London, lead singer,  Natalie Maines, addressed the British audience and made this statement to them, "We don't want this war, this violence, and we're ashamed that the President of the United States (George W. Bush) is from Texas," which received a positive reaction from the British audience. However, fans did not have the same reaction. Some fans and other people wrote her hate mail, made threats, and after a while, after her bandmates were threatened that they'd lose their careers, she made the choice against her better judgment to publicly apologize to the president. She then later retracted her apology for disrespecting the president saying this, "I don't feel that way anymore," "I don't feel he is owed any respect whatsoever." President Bush also stated, “The Dixie Chicks are free to speak their mind. They can say what they want to say.” Of the backlash the Dixie chicks were facing from fans, President Bush added: “They shouldn’t have their feelings hurt just because some people don’t want to buy their records when they speak out.” But is it only that they do not want to buy their records? What about the death threats? What about the hate mail? I would say it is more than that.

I definitely feel that I am not ready to make nice with some people in my life. I never listened to that song when it first came out, and so I did not know the story behind it, but I sure did feel that it was my song. My anthem for what I believed, and what I feel at this time in my life.

My husband has one parent left and he is close to her. He does not want to not have her in his life; he wants us to be close. Even if, and when, she does shady things, he puts up with it. He may get mad at her for a minute, but myself? I am not ready to make nice. I have been nice for almost five years now, and I am so done with how things are now that I am fighting back in ways I never did before. I am not ready to back down. I am standing my ground.

Until her bandmates were in jeopardy, she had refused to apologize. And only when she did it for them, did she feel she had gone against herself. It was the principal if it all. And after she apologized she took it back, because she did not feel he deserved it, and should not have gotten it just solely because he was the President of the United States.

Let us remember, respect has to be earned, not demanded. What would you do in her place? I have been thinking a lot lately about standing up or sitting down. If you do not stand up then you let the mistreatment continue. That is NOT something I am going to do. So while I am not ready to make nice, should I sacrifice that for my husband just to feel the same way she did later?

I am not ready to make nice. And I will no longer bend to satisfy her needs, but I will stand by my own.

So, thank you, Dan and Natalie, for this song.

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