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The Day I Found Nirvana - A Tribute to Kurt Cobain's Enduring Legacy

How the Pacific Northwest punk scene shaped the identity of countless fans and contemporary musicians

By Declan PowersPublished 7 years ago 3 min read
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Photo courtesy Spin Magazine

(This tribute was originally written on what would have been Kurt Cobain's 50th birthday).

I originally wasn't going to wish Kurt Cobain a happy 50th birthday today, because I've grown out of Nirvana a little bit after being a fan since I first heard Nevermind when I was around 14. But I still remember the first time I listened to "Smells Like Teen Spirit," and I remember what that all lead to.

I was looking through a playlist on an iPod that wasn't mine, bored. I looked through and listened to everything, and it just wasn't what I was looking for.

That is until I found Nirvana.

Since getting into more underground and lesser known, less accessible punk rock music like Fugazi and Bikini Kill, and reading extensively on the history of the Pacific Northwest scene of the 1990s, I've come to realize that the fact that Nirvana was the standout band emanating from that era of music did not mean they were the best or the most important. Without bands like Green River or Mother Love Bone, or even The Melvins, to name a few, Nirvana wouldn't exist.

I particularly admire Bikini Kill's feminist movement Riot Grrrl and how it influenced American politics, at least for a while. People seem to miss that Kurt was a vehement defender of women's rights; that seems to have been lost on a lot of people. For a band that was trying to rebel against the macho cock-rock of other contemporaries like Guns 'N Roses, in my opinion, their polished, in some ways overproduced sound drowned out any notion of Kurt's sincerity of being one of the few true male rock and roll feminists of his time. Everyone just focused on the insane lyrics and the fact that his band was very, very loud.

So in regard to both originality and message, I feel that Nirvana misses the mark in comparison to the other bands of its time.

So given all this, why do I still give a shit? What compels me to still listen to Nirvana for the last eleven years?

The honesty.

Despite having a loud, head-banging sound that's been endlessly imitated but never replicated, what struck me most about Kurt's voice is that underneath all the pain and angst, he came through as a completely honest, sincere and in many ways humble person. Kurt, Dave, Krist, and Pat couldn't give two fucks if their music wasn't what the mass majority wanted, or even if people liked them. They just did their own thing. And that was as punk rock as it gets. They were a band that said, "It doesn't matter how much talent you have. Just pick up a guitar and play. Just remember the passion."

It was that honesty and showmanship that inspired me to pick up a guitar for the first time and take lessons. Over the course of about nine years, I've grown and evolved as a songwriter in skill and lyricism, and been able to discover a voice I didn't know I had.

All because of one band I discovered by accident on the iPod of my mom's ex-boyfriend.

So what do I owe to Nirvana or Kurt's short but lasting legacy? More than I can quantify. No matter how much I change in my personal taste in music, Nirvana will always stand as the band that solidified my desire to create musical art. For that, I am eternally grateful.

On Cobain's 50th birthday, I urge anyone who was touched by his music like I have been not to dwell on the way he chose to end himself but rather on how his music makes you FEEL, the relevance it has on your own life. Because that's what music is all about.

Happy 50, Kurt.

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Declan Powers

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